Tig-sulat pud baya ko…

What glory it bids?

If I’m lured to go

Where pious and not

Traverse to and fro.

Hear the music—loud

Bombastic speakers

Match the vendor’s call.

To hear the swindles

Make-out with lewdness

As the church bell strikes

Match looming prayers.

So prays the contrite,

The devout as well.

Both sinner and saint

Came to pass or dwell.

What co-existence

The music and noise,

Truth and connivance,

Beauty and discord.

It’s where prayers bind

With curses, entwined.

Indeed, what a state,

To dwell in heav’n’s den,

And in sin’s haven.

"The terrible thing about searching for the truth is that you find it."

from The Order

It just dawned on me, though.  I just made a call to my brother and earlier today, to my Tatay and Nanay.  My father’s coming over this weekend though so we can talk lots about life–my new life particularly.  But yeah, I am missin’ my folks. Those good ol’ times.  Argh! For the heck of trying to let slumber invite me, I shall count the ways:

1) Tatay, and his spur-of-the-moment comments that may be corny at times and yet never failing to give me some good laughs.  And his admonitions, yeah!  The wisest person I’ve known next to the great Ernest! (Nyahaha)

2) Nanay, and her long list of instructions of do’s and don’ts.  Her prescriptions for almost all ills, hah! The most gracious host perhaps, my nanay keeps on amazing me on how she manages her busy schedule as a mother to a pack of fantastic four kids. Thanks for giving me the curls, maderr.

3) Oh, Zerds.  My brother who is my extreme. Easy on the blowin’ man, you’ll get mumps.  I’ve seen him struggling just to keep up with me, but he just can’t (hahahaha). We had bouts of fights but in the end, I exit the stage when he plays on his trumpet or saxophone.

4) Lyn, my favorite sister.  Super sweet (at least to me) and the sibling who’s got the biggest pie of my money. Hehehe.  I’ve seen her grow from a gremlin to a desirable woman (Nyaks). But she’s a good singer to add as a feature to that pretty face and almost-perfect buns, haha.

5) El Dean, the total package in the family.  He’s super cool.  He’s making handsomeness a thing of the past for me and my other bro.He sings and plays the guitar. He’s intelligent and witty. He’s a table tennis player.  And oh, getting taller (5′4" at 12 years old is kinda tall for me) sans Cherifer. Hehe.

My family, how I miss them… and all I can do is brag ’bout them.

Ang hirap mag-sulat sa Filipino…hehe.

_________________________________

1.anung kwento ng pangalan mo?
* Sabi ng tatay ko, galling daw ito sa pangalan ng dalawang magagaling na mga tao sa larangan nga theolohiya: Si Ernest Pickering, isang tanyag na manunulat, at R.W. Dale, isang ebanghelista.

2.anung kwento ng parents mo?
* Ang kanilang pag-iibigan ay nagsimula pa nung sila’y nasa kolehiyo.  Magkaparehong kurso kasi. Ika nga, “it’s a match made in heaven.”

3.anung kwento nung 7th bday mo?
* Kami lang sa bahay ang kumakain. Madamot ako kaya di ko hilig ang mangumbida.

4.anung kwento last bday mo?
* May trabaho yun.  Isang meeting sa

Cebu

. Ako lang ang pinagbayad ng kinain ng team ko. Pero official charging ‘yon kasi meeting pa rin.

6.anung kwento ng lovelife mo ngayon?
* Ngeks. Magkaibigan kami hanggang ngayon.

7.anung kwento ng cellphone mo?
* Dalawa na kasi binigay na ng kumpanyang pinapasukan ko ang aking fone.

8. anung kwento ng computer mo?
* Kainis. Kakasoli ko lang ng laptop ko sa opisina kasi ‘di na ako field… Pero sa Abril meron na ulit. Ngayon desktop muna.

9.anung kwento ng kwarto mo?
* Ma-mi-miss ko ang hotel na ‘to.  Dalawang araw na lang, lipat na ako sa titirhan ko…

10.anung kwento mo last christmas?
* Masaya kapiling ang pamilya. Kaarawan din ng lolo ko.

11.anung kwento mo last valentine’s day?
* Foodnet. Lovapalooza—organizer kasi kumpanyang pinagtratrabahuan ko.

12.anung kwento ng sapatos na suot mo ngayon?
* Gusto ko kasi ang tibay… Pwedeng pang-opisina, pang-gimik, pang-lakwatsa… Isa lang pero maaasahan.  Yung iba nasa “boxes for shipment” pa.

13. anung kwento mo kung panu mo naging gf/bf yun mahal mo?
* Naku, grade 4 pa ako nun. Naging kami din pero naghiwalay din kasi maraming komplikasyon…hehe… Alam nya yun.

14.anung kwento sayo ng nanay mo tungkol kay santa claus?
* Bata pa ako sinabi na nilang ‘di totoo yun.

15.anung kwento tungkol sa inyo ng bestfriend mo?
* Si Poypoy dahil sa aksidenteng kinsangkutan nya nung 2^nd year high.

* Si Sansan dahil palagi kaming seatmate.

* Si Joselle kasi ex ko sya at dami ko ng sinabi sa kanya.

16.anung kwento nung last movie na pinanood mo?
* hollywoodland—magaling

sana

yung transition at story line pero pangit ng ending…Oh well, based on reality kasi so di pwedeng lagyan ng gawa-gawang ending.

17.anung kwento tungkol sa huling lugar na pinuntahan mo?
* resto sa may malate. umalis kaming di nagbayad kasi nagkaroon ng riot… Sayang ang Bolognese na inorder ko.

18.anung kwento nung last time na umiyak ka?
* January 8.  Paalis ako nun ng Visayas… Mga pangyayaring kailan man ay ‘di dapat i-kwento.

19.anung kwento ng greatest achievement mo so far?
* Naku… Ang hirap magbuhat ng sarling bangko kung nakapatong ka na sa bangkong ito. Nyahaha.  Every little thing you do is an achievement in a way…

20.anung kwento nung huling librong binasa mo?
* The makings of a visual merchandiser and a graphic artist. Hehe… Malapit na.

Are you tired with your life?

Bored with your relationships?

Stressed at work?

You need to refresh! Take time off to assess your life and re-focus your perspectives.

AT THE CROSSROADS—Past Forward Intensified, a 3-day camp on February 23–25, 2007 at Mambukal Mountain Resort. It aims to discuss different relationships of the participants with God, themselves, families and workplace, and to get them more zealous and committed in their professions by reinforcing them in their different
areas of expertise.

Among the topics are Stress Management, Law of Process, Entrepreneurship, Handling Relationships, Multi-tasking and Prioritizing.

Speakers include Mr. Cito Beltran, TV personality and former TV Host of ANC’s Straight Talk, Mr. Rex Resurreccion, author of the best selling book “Called to Excel”, Dr. Roy Salathiel Verzosa, Instructor, The Apollos Project and Mr.Bach John “BJ” Sebastian, Corporate Planning Director of JG Summit Holdings, Inc., a division of the Gokongwei Group of Companies.

The camp is open to all professionals, government workers,  entrepreneurs,church leaders and pastors, employers or employees,  and anyone that is in the crossroads of his life.

Registration is at P 1,500.00/participant inclusive of aircon
accommodation, food, transportation from assembly point to camp site and camp materials. For non-aircon accommodation, registration is at P1,200.00/participant.

For more information or to register, please call Ms. Arbee Arceo, 709-0050 or 0919-5227255 or Ms. Edna “Apple” Criador, 4341109 loc 103 or 0920-4737237.

“All my bags are packed, I’m ready to go…”

Oh yeah, I’m more than ready to go except that my bags are not packed yet.  I am supposed to be on my way to

Bacolod

now to pack my things but, no, I am here in this familiar room I used to call mine, keying in some stupid thoughts with little streaks of intelligence <naks>.

I am ready to go.

I try convincing myself that.  I am ready to go.  Yeah, I keep telling myself.  The more I believe I am, the more I feel I am not.  I am ready to go.  But there are things I have to leave. Dumaguete and its rhythmic rain. Bais and its idyllic homesteads. 

Cebu

and its surprising episodes.

Bacolod

and its pretentious sweetness.  Ah, Visayas and its people—friends and fans alike.

I am ready to go.

I have been welcomed with warmth at the other end—my supposed destination.  I know I should be there.  There, where I have to brave the fast lanes.  There, where I have to keep my eyes rolling for predators in angelic casing.  There, where life is more about making a choice between ‘eat or be eaten’.  There, where I have to traverse rivers of risks and dangers.  But I know it’s there where I can grow.  It’s there where I can be maximised. It’s there where I can be of greater benefit to others.

I am ready to go.

To turn my back to mishaps… glories… pains… existence… life.  And maybe… just maybe… face new mishaps… new glories… new pains… new existence… new life.  Ah, indeed change is one permanent thing!

I am ready to go. Am I really?

Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with. It responds like a snail to our impatience, then it races like a gazelle when you can’t catch a breath.

-Joe Wentworth, “Simon Birch”

"Dreamers seldom wake, to find there dreams come true…"

______________________________________________________________

Here I am catching up American Idol replay on ABC 5, and contemplated on my desire to be…ahem, ahem… a judge. Hehe.

By the way, Simon Cowell is the manager of Il Divo, the classical cross-over all-male quartet.  And they are performing on the 20th. Wish I could watch but, man, the ticket prices just won’t fit in the boojay.  Hmmmm, wish I was part of the Il Divo quintet…Less ambitious would be me being a baritone for its Filipino counterpart…Hehe.

A movie, though, I can afford.  But why pay when you can have it for free?

I watched "Stranger Than Fiction" preview, and man, the movie was simply great. I was in this room filled with movie critics, writers, and some celebs intellectually enjoying the stream of exchanges in that wonderfully-woven script. Thanks to Orlan for his movie club passes. Maybe, I can be a critic, too. Hehe.

Or maybe, I can be a celebrity…Nah! I don’t like being flocked…Hahaha… But then, maybe I can try out becoming a voice actor.  Yep, heard me alright.  Voice actor. 

I was in a conversation with Noel Jon last Sunday and we were talkin’ about careers.  I blurted that I really wanted to become a voice actor.  And that led to discovering what are other "odd" job options.

So let me talk about that dream.  I think my move to Manila brings me closer to realizing that.  Yep, it’s here where that sort of service is needed, most.  Or maybe a voice over, a narrator, a DJ, a radio announcer…Ah, all in the name of vox. Hmmm…media moguls, I am your man. Hehe.

It may be a joke but ’tis true.

I don’t know whether the realization is here and now…or maybe when I am 50 and (re)tired.

But well, a dream is a wish your heart makes.  I am making that wish.  I am making that prayer…that it’ll be soon.

by Ernest Dale Acar

Did I rouse the tiger?

Now I am running away…

I can no longer hear the voice

Of the wild winds.

For what fills the air

Is the roar of the tiger’s.

Running away…

For death awaits

In the crevices of its fangs.

Now I am a victim

Of a circumstance I crafted.

Running away…

Fleeing in fear,

Elbows for my own biting.

I blame not the tiger

But all fault I take

For ‘tis my venture

In its coniferous habitation

That led to its full awakening.

I am but regretting

What a fool’s part I played.

To be wise again,

I learned.

Never a mêlée with the tiger,

Even play in its quarter.

I will miss the wild winds’ call

For a time or so.

But with the roar’s fading,

The winds, I will be lulled.

I think some people are born to arouse the monster in you.  Even worse would be to make a devil out you, minus the Prada to boot.

But I want to look at all these with a different light.  My fingers are crossed (and I don’t normally do that) in hope that this season will end with a big surprise.  Maybe these people who are raised in hell are simply playing good actors, conniving to loosen your bolts in the nut. Sometimes, I would want to have this ordeal end with Bitoy or Ashton coming out to surprise you with hidden camcorders and coverted microphones. 

Maybe a better wish would be having a Dr. Buddy Rydell to pester me around.  But no.  Reality is, what I am going through is for real and there is no hyped psychological treatment going on.  No, not even a taping.

So there. I am angry–"implosively" angry.  Why? No details needed here but the point is, I am angry.  And this blog is my therapist.

No relief yet, though.